The Incomparable

61 "Luther Gillis File #OOI" (E5E10)

Luther Gillis is back, but this time he’s paired with the Butler—that’s Higgins—to sniff out an extortion plot. Meanwhile, the Big Guy (that’s Magnum) is wearing a suit and staring into a computer screen. The world is topsy-turvy!

60 "Old Acquaintance" (S6E3)

A dictator of a made-up country is going to be assassinated by a marine park dolphin who was kidnapped by a high-school friend of Magnum’s! Oh, no, this episode is not ridiculous at all. How have we done sixty episodes of this podcast?

59 "The Love-For-Sale Boat" (S5E17)

This episode sounded a lot better on Magnum Dash Mania Dot Com, the official bible of “Magnum, podcast.”

But it turned out to be… a lemon.

58 "Adelaide" (S1E14)

Why is guarding a valuable thoroughbred horse the subject of scorn? The answer is that this is Early Magnum, and so Magnum’s friends are kind of jerks. Also there’s a lady from Iowa whose relationship with Magnum is perplexing on multiple fronts. Then there’s the “Frankenstein Island” connection. It’s a weird episode. But we have many new segments, one invented by a listener!

57 "The Kona Winds" (S6E4)

The winds! They stir the blood! And so begins a classic tale of Wind Noir, as a mysterious woman enters Magnum’s life and entwines him in a web of deception… and murder?! Tune your transistors to Radio Exposition and batten down the hatches—it’s going to be a windy ride.

56 "Tropical Madness" (S2E7)

Higgins is in love. Magnum is convinced the lady is up to no good, but Higgins is convinced Magnum is just jealous. Also, there are a couple of yo-yos. But when are we going to get to the tropical madness?!

Thanks to Listener Allyson for winning the Listener Blair award for episode recommendations.

55 "Squeeze Play" (S4E7)

Sleazy magazine publisher Buzz Benoit has made a bet with Robin Masters! If Robin’s softball team, led by Thomas Magnum, doesn’t win a game against Benoit’s ringers, the estate is gone and Magnum and Higgins will have to start a sitcom about living together in a Real Nice Condo provided by Rick. (Doesn’t sound so bad.) Isn’t this supposed to be a show about crimes? No, friend, it’s a show about softball shenanigans! And… uh, actually, a whole lot of sexism. Let’s focus on the positives: More segments!

54 "Death and Taxes" (S7E6)

Rub a dub dub, three men on a podcast. And who do you think they be mad at? It’s probably Listener Blair, who asks us if this episode resembles the plot of recent film “The Batman”? It certainly resembles an episode of “Miami Vice,” right down to the Genesis montage. Riddle me this, Magnum!

53 "Summer School" (S6E13)

We return from our own summer school to discuss an episode featuring young Tate Donovan as young RJ “Robin Junior” Masters, who drives a green Ferrari and pretends to be Magnum. But this might be one case the kid is not ready for…

52 "Missing Melody" (S7E11)

The turkeys from your favorite Magnum-related podcast are back for a new Summer of Magnum, but we have to start on a sad note. Roger E. Mosley, the secret weapon of the “Magnum” ensemble, died earlier this month. In his honor, we watch his favorite episode of “Magnum,” one he co-wrote and features heavily in.

Also, and we can’t restate this enough: Never, ever go in a bathroom at the Honolulu airport.

50 "Tigers Fan" (S8E4)

We wrap up another season of “Magnum, podcast” with another episode about death. It’s Tanaka’s final episode, and what an unsatisfying conclusion it is. But there’s a Jan Hammer-style musical montage, and machine guns, and other things that remind us of “Miami Vice” and not “Magnum, p.i.” Fortunately, there’s also T.C. and Thomas debating the merits of baseball. We could watch that all day. You’ll miss us here at Magnum, podcast, the incoherence, the bizarre segments, the arguments… see you for our holiday special later this year!

49 "Foiled Again" (S3E8)

En garde! Dana Wynter returns, but this time she’s a former Higgins crush. Unfortunately, Higgins “accidentally” electrocutes her jerk husband with a fencing foil and is accused of his murder. But maybe the wife did it! Or her son, TV’s Spider-Man, Nicholas Hammond! Or maybe it’s the other guest star who we haven’t accounted for yet! We discuss Magnum’s limp and hand injury, find a lost bikini top, complain about awful looping, have a disagreement about the Atlanta Falcons, and Jason finally reads that listener letter. Also: A big announcement about the future of Magnum, Podcast! (Don’t worry.)

48 "Double Jeopardy" (S2E19)

THIS! IS! DOUBLE JEOPARDY! In the first of two episodes featuring Dana Wynter as a guest star, we (once again) discuss how time works, Magnum turns into The Fall Guy, TC has a realization about how boring sets are, Tanaka embodies the spirit of Hawaiian Columbo, and David and Phil pre-empt Jason’s letters segment with segments of their own. Maybe we’ll hear that letter next week. This podcast has bad lighting and an incomprehensible script, but at least it features the Hawaiian coastline!

45 "Murder 101" (S5E8)

Magnum doesn’t see a g-g-g-g-g-host! But otherwise this is an episode of Scooby-Doo with special guest star Thomas Magnum. Not that we’re complaining! Magnum and his class of Private Investigation 101 students solve a case! Magnum gets punched in a bathroom! And in a shocking display of a lack of professionalism, Jason abdicates his role as summarizer and the entire episode is recapped by one of our listeners when they were 12. Except for the part where MOM CAME IN. Also we say mean things about “Dead Poet’s Society.” Carpe Magnum!

44 "Computer Date" (S2E13)

Jason’s returned from Hawaii, and he managed not to be murdered in an airport bathroom, so let’s do this! This episode features computers but not dates, another appearance by the wife of a series actor, another laser-industry related crime, a notable hotel appearance, Rick being a jerk, T.C. at his worst, and the proper use of Mac. Also, Magnum wears jeans with a jacket and tie. All this, but STILL no computer date! Oh well, at least we’ve got letters from listeners.

42 "I Never Wanted to Go to France, Anyway" (S6E12)

This is the one where Magnum and company all go work at a carnival to solve a murder! It doesn’t make a lick of sense, but you’ll hear one of the most inaccurate American accents of all time from Kiwi guest star Clive Revill! Also there’s a spooky clown and a guy with a hockey mask. Gee, I hope the guy with the hockey mask didn’t do it. Also: A long discussion of Elvis movies and another lengthy digression about local TV stations.

41 "Ki'i's Don't Lie" (S3E3) & "Emeralds Are Not a Girl's Best Friend" (S&S S2E1)

San Diego resident Steve Lutz joins us to discuss Magnum’s CBS-mandated crossover with the San Diego TV P.I. brothers of “Simon & Simon.” Tiki idols! El Presidente versus the guerillas! Morgan Fairchild! It’s an awful lot of 80s TV, and this is an awful lot of an episode.

38 "Murder By Night" (S7E14)

It was raining in the city by the bay. A hard rain. Hard enough to wash the entire cast of “Magnum, p.i.” over from Hawaii for an episode that’s entirely film noir pastiche. It’s not bad, though it misses some casting opportunities, exposes the lack of women regulars in the show, and is inexplicably shown in color when it should be shown as it originally aired—in glorious black-and-white. Turn down the color setting on your 4K HDR and enjoy Magnum, by night… until Higgins wakes you up, anyway.

37 "Legacy From a Friend" (S3E19)

Magnum’s best friend who we’ve never seen before dies! Can Magnum solve the case? You bet he can, unless he’s foiled by special guest star Annie Potts! She’s the best thing in this episode, which also features a remarkably large number of things that make no sense. So many, in fact, that we had to create a new segment featuring legendary playwright Anton Chekhov.

36 "Legend of the Lost Art" (S8E10)

It’s the return of the great adventure! Tom Selleck never got to be Indiana Jones, but Thomas Magnum isn’t too bad of a consolation prize. And in this utterly bananas episode, Magnum plays Indy, but nobody can remember the name of that movie. Speaking of bananas, David brings us back to “Tales from ‘Tales of the Gold Monkey’”, we share our mutual love of Margaret Colin, Phil’s family is heard from, and David’s Lego Magnum obsession continues.

35 "A.A.P.I." (S7E5)

This week we’ve got a return of a bunch of guest stars from episodes we haven’t covered yet—that’s the kind of professionalism you can expect from “Magnum, podcast.” Also, even more new segments, Phil appreciates Annie Potts, we get a letter from a listener, and David may have gone off the deep end!

34 "Professor Jonathan Higgins" (S5E13)

Ello, mate! Wots all dis, den? A Higgins relative needs a makeover in order to function in high society. As Magnum will remind you, this is just like the plot of the movie “My Fair Lady,” with Audrey Hepburn. Meanwhile, we’re on the lookout for a new slogan for Mrs. Peroni’s Frozen Pizza. The winner gets an all expenses paid trip to nowhere!

33 "Holmes is Where the Heart Is" (S4E18)

Legendary British actor Patrick Macnee guest stars on a Higgins-centric episode of “Magnum, p.i.,” featuring a flashback to an adventure at Robin’s Nest back in the ’70s, with Higgins as Watson to Macnee’s delusional Holmes. Meanwhile, in this segment-centric episode of “Magnum, podcast,” we discuss beards and these young whippersnapper criminals today.

32 "Mac's Back" (S5E3)

You thought he was dead! But Magnum thinks Mac is alive! Is he seeing things, cracking up, or aware that the same actor has been cast in a similar part but with a fake mustache? We break it down, and also introduce some important new segments involving “Tales of the Gold Monkey” and ice cream.

31 "Infinity and Jelly Doughnuts" (S8E1)

You thought we were dead! But no, after hearing Higgins yell at us we’ve made the bad decision to return for more. We discuss the attempt to undo the damage of killing off Magnum and then bringing the show back for one last season. (There’s a reason we don’t talk about season eight.)

27 "Let the Punishment Fit the Crime" (S4E17)

Higgins puts on a production of “The Mikado.” Magnum takes a hard-luck case. The plots converge. It’s the perfect archetypal episode of “Magnum, p.i.”! As for your hosts, we have no idea what we are doing and the entire episode is gibberish. It’s us, not you, Magnum.

26 "Home from the Sea" (S4E1)

This is a special episode. There’s a lot of nonsense, and also a lot of really great stuff. Magnum is lost at sea. Rick, T.C., and Higgins feel the tingling of their Magnum-Sense. In the end, is this the best that Magnum has to offer? Possibly, but we’ll still make time to talk about dumb stuff like baseball caps and Tiger Stadium stock footage.

25 "The Black Orchid" (S1E16)

The rich aren’t like you and me, Magnum. They have wants… needs… desires. And sometimes they must play The Game. The world’s most dangerous— wait, we’re hearing it’s not that dangerous after all.

24 "Rembrandt's Girl" (S4E14)

Carol Burnett locks Magnum in a bank vault! The Ferrari gets towed! Rick and T.C. throw an ’80s party at Magnum’s swinging pad! Higgins hosts a meditation retreat that we suspect is actually an orgy! This episode has it all.

20 "A Sense of Debt" (S4E8)

It’s the episode where Magnum goes to Detroit to watch an entire Tigers homestand and ends up meeting star players Lou Whitaker and Alan Trammell! Unfortunately, that’s about five minutes of this episode—the rest of it involves T.C. becoming an underground boxer in order to protect Shannen Doherty and her dad because he accidentally drove the Ferrari into a bunch of pigs. Pretty typical stuff.

19 "The Arrow That Is Not Aimed" (S3E14)

Legendary actor Mako appears in this episode that is the height of 1980s obsession with Japanese culture. Magnum meets a samurai who is about to commit seppuku because he’s lost a priceless ancient Japanese plate. There are Limo Ninjas! Also, Higgins may have murdered Magnum at the end.

18 "J. 'Digger' Doyle" (S1E17)

In a spin-off attempt that went nowhere, we get to meet J. “Digger” Doyle, played by Erin Gray right between her roles in “Buck Rogers” and “Silver Spoons.” We do an awful lot of Orson Welles impressions. Jason is frustrated by Higgins’s flagrant cock-blocking of Magnum. And what is this awful laser-related fiction Robin Masters is dictating?

17 "One More Summer" (S2E17)

Magnum and T.C. walk on to an NFL team during training camp, because that’s how football works. Hey, it’s Pat Morita! And Dick Butkus! We invent Higgins’s podcast. And Phil has some very important Fritz Feld follow-up.

14 "Birdman of Budapest" (S3E16)

The Hungarian Revolution. An elusive bird expert. A… murderous macaw? Just your average wacky episode of “Magnum, p.i.” Whoops! (feathers)

Please watch this 35 second Magnum clip. I have not stopped laughing. pic.twitter.com/nneXjJxUPj

Chris “Wear A Mask” Driver (@Jerkwheatery) June 30, 2020

12 "The Big Blow" (S3E22)

A hurricane is bearing down on Hawaii, a solstice-themed party is an excuse to find a potential murderer, and a violent idiot named Randy comes to the Masters Estate. The locals on the shortwave are calling it The Big Blow!

Also, this podcast finally gets its wings, as we share our first listener follow-up and ignite a controversy about time and space in “Magnum, p.i.” (If you have comments, whisper them into a coconut and then send the coconut to podcast@theincomparable.com.)

11 "Deja Vu" (S6E1)

It seemed like a prophetic dream, but it’s true — our Official England Expert Antony Johnston rejoins us to discuss the sixth season premiere, “Deja Vu,” in which Magnum, Higgins, and Rick go to London, meet Peter Davison and Julian Glover, grapple with family ties and the legacy of the Vietnam war, investigate a maybe-murder that may be connected to a perfectly timed assassination plot, and drive a series of interesting cars. Meanwhile, T.C. is having the time of his life in Morocco!

8 "The Elmo Ziller Story" (S2E21)

John Hillerman does a funny accent in order to save Higgins’s niece’s family rodeo from the hands of her wicked stepmother. It is more ridiculous than it sounds.

7 "The Ugliest Dog in Hawaii" (S1E8)

An actor you might remember from “The Godfather, Part II” steals every scene in this episode about mobsters trying to kidnap a dog. We loved it.

6 "Novel Connection" (S7E9) and "Magnum On Ice" (MSW S3E8)

In a special crossover episode, we’re joined by Scott McNulty, host of a “Murder, She Wrote” podcast that doesn’t exist (yet?), to discuss Magnum meeting Jessica Fletcher in a special two-show episode. These episodes feature lanai PCs, crowbars, Sheraton lobbies, an endless B-plot involving Rick and T.C.’s shady Maui land deal, and not nearly enough fun crossover interplay between the characters of two legendary 1980s CBS series. Also, the plot makes zero sense.

4 "The Case of the Red-Faced Thespian" (S4E12)

The funny head wounds continue, as Higgins transforms into an even more pompous character in the midst of a 1920s revival party populated by a bunch of rich friends of Robin Masters. Also, T.C. would like an autograph—for his sister.

2 "I Witness" (S4E21)

Jason gets upset about time zones, but Phil doesn’t remember it that way. David puts on a pig costume and sings “Feelings.” And nobody mentions the dead guy.

1 "Don't Eat the Snow in Hawaii" (S1E1-2)

The snow is cocaine, and it’s used as a murder weapon involving an incident in Vietnam years before. Welcome to the lighthearted romp that is “Magnum, p.i.”! Also, we discuss the airport bathrooms we’d prefer to be murdered in.